I was surprised at how vehemently I disagreed with the 404 Media podcast episode The Screen Time Panic Sets Parents Up to Fail; while in general I agree with all the points they bring up, I felt that they were too quick to dismiss the AAP recommendations for childrens screen time. Patrick very quickly skims over the idea that it's possible to raise children with limited screen time in 2026, based on the faulty assumption that parents usage of technology is calcified and sclerotic. It's entirely possible to raise children with little to no screen time, but it requires that parents critically examine their on relationships with technology and make difficult changes.

In general it's not a controversial statement that screen time is bad for young children; as their brains are developing they need to learn how to manipulate their surroundings, rather than passively react to them. This is why the American Academy of Pediatrics is so clear in their recommendations: no screen time before 18 months. That is not an unreasonable goal: don't show them your phone, wait to watch TV until they're asleep, and if you've fed them and changed them and they're still upset, put in some earplugs and hold them (or put them in a play pen if you've got something critical to accomplish.) This is what people did before TV.

What I really took exception to was the idea that as children get older and reach school age it's somehow hypocritical to use a phone while you deny your children screen time, but parents do that every day! No one would possibly think that "well you were drinking a beer for dinner so you'd be a hypocrite if you didn't pour your daughter a guiness" is some sort of understandable parenting practice! Explain to your child what screen addiction is, tell them that you're working really hard to not use screens at home but the people who make netflix and discord and telgram have managed to trick you into thinking that you need to look at your phone so frequently! If they're old enough to understand what lying is, they'll be able to understand that.

Emanuel and Patrick aren't bad parents, and in fact they're probably great parents. What they also are, however, are journalists: a profession that is so tightly leashed to social media and the internet that they cannot conceive of the better world that I dream of, one where it's easier to get a pistol than a facebook account. They are also, per the podcast episode, in social circles where other parents have given their children phones, which is a tremendously damaging event for any parents trying to maintain a no/low-screen lifestyle. The Wait until 8th pledge is really compelling, and it's definitely worth consideration.

So what can parents do? Get a landline. Seriously: it'll be cheaper than a cell phone and your kid can call their friends and talk as long as they want. Get your kid a flip phone if you have some absolute critical need for them to be able to call you from anywhere, even though it's never been easier ifor a child to find someone with a phone of their own to borrow for a call.

And here's the big thing: it's ok to let them watch a little tv or use the phone a little if they've been good or you're about to lose your shit, it's not the end of the world! It's absolutely ok to not be a perfect parent because just making the smallest effort is so shockingly rare that it immediately shoots you to the top of the rankings. There are hundreds to thousands of worse parents than you, within a 1 mile radius. Just Try!